I looked up to the sky, and I wondered why, I realized there was this wetness running down my face.
Is too late to do anything? Does it make a difference? Do I make a difference? I can not keep these dark thoughts from filling my mind at this moment. It is not a creep or a passing thought, but I am overwhelmed with thoughts and emotions.
Keep in mind - this blog may suck... Not in the degrading sense, but it may open some wounds that we try to suppress.
My name is Christian Meyer, and after years of dedication to the EMS profession, I’ve witnessed a critical issue that often goes unaddressed amidst our focus on technical skills and operational efficiency: mental health. We spend countless hours perfecting our abilities in airway management, intubation, and bleeding control, but when it comes to mental health, our resources and support structures are often woefully inadequate. It's time to shift our focus and address this crucial aspect of our well-being.
A Personal Journey
Allow me to share a personal narrative to highlight why it’s essential to address mental health more thoroughly. At 15, I was deeply immersed in the EMS world, frequently visiting my father at work and dreaming of one day following in his footsteps. I started as a cadet, then progressed to EMT, and eventually became a paid EMT. While this trajectory is familiar to many, my journey reveals deeper and often unspoken truths about our profession.
My first encounter with a suicide patient came at 16—a man who had lost everything and chose to end his life. I remember feeling out of place as the other responders made light-hearted jokes. The comment, “You’re not going to make it long in this profession if you cannot laugh,” was a harsh introduction to the coping mechanisms frequently employed in our field. It was a formative experience that left a lasting impact on me, emphasizing that we are often encouraged to suppress our emotions rather than address them.
At 18, I responded to a tragic accident involving a child. The questions that plagued me—why did this happen, why was it on my watch—fuel the belief that we are not okay. This incident was a stark reminder of the heavy emotional toll our work can take.
The following year, a co-worker, a friend with whom I shared countless shifts and laughter, took his own life. Despite our camaraderie, we both carried burdens that were never fully acknowledged or understood by each other. This tragic loss further highlighted the reality that we are not okay.
Our Story Is Still Unfolding
Every member of our field has a story, and no matter our age or level of experience, our stories are still evolving. I am not a mental health expert; I’m a Mobile Intensive Care Paramedic who has grown increasingly frustrated with the superficial solutions and empty gestures that frequently follow tragedies in our profession. We’re excellent at honoring our fallen with tributes such as mourning bands, social media posts, and commemorative T-shirts, but when it comes to providing meaningful support and follow-up, we often fall short. This lack of sustained action contributes significantly to the struggles we face.
Understanding the Nature of Our Work
The nature of our work means that we regularly confront death and suffering. Many of us are drawn to this profession seeking to bring control and order to a chaotic world. Yet, constant exposure to trauma, combined with the use of unhealthy coping mechanisms, exacerbates the problem. This cycle of exposure and numbing can lead to a buildup of emotional stress and unresolved trauma.
The Unseen Trauma
We often discuss our experiences with a sense of pride, as if enduring trauma is a badge of honor. This mindset masks the true emotional toll we endure. Our coping strategies—such as indulging in fast food, smoking, or working excessive overtime—are temporary solutions that only add to our emotional burden. It’s crucial to recognize that these methods do not address the root of the problem but rather perpetuate it.
The Disconnect
One of the significant challenges we face is communicating our struggles to those who haven’t experienced the same. Significant others and family members might not understand the depth of our pain, and we frequently shield them from it. This disconnect can lead to strained relationships and further contribute to our mental health struggles. We need to find ways to bridge this gap and foster open communication.
Acknowledging the Problem
Acknowledging that mental health is as vital as physical health is a critical first step. We must stop viewing mental health issues as weaknesses and start treating them with the seriousness they deserve. This involves having honest conversations about mental health, seeking help when needed, and creating a supportive environment within our teams.
Taking Action
Creating a culture of understanding and empathy is essential for improving our collective well-being. Here are some practical steps we can take:
Promote Open Dialogue: Encourage open discussions about mental health within your team. Normalize conversations about stress, trauma, and emotional well-being.
Provide Training: Advocate for and participate in mental health training for all EMS personnel. This training should cover recognizing signs of distress in oneself and others, as well as effective coping strategies.
Offer Peer Support: Establish peer support programs where colleagues can offer a listening ear and share their experiences without judgment.
Encourage Professional Help: Advocate for access to mental health professionals who specialize in trauma and first responder issues. Ensure that resources and support are readily available.
Create a Supportive Environment: Foster an environment where seeking help is encouraged and supported. This includes reducing stigma and creating policies that prioritize mental health.
Resources
If you or someone you know is struggling, there are resources available:
Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: 988
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
Share The Load: 1-888-731-3473
Safe Call Now: 1-206-459-3020
Crisis Text Line: Text 741741
Frontline Helpline: 1-866-676-7500
We may not be okay, and acknowledging this fact is the first step toward healing. As you may be asking yourself now "Where did the title come from". Well why do clouds cry, the answer is simple yet effective. They are offloading all that weight. They are washing away the pain and torment. We too must do this as humans. It’s crucial to recognize our struggles, seek support, and remember why we chose this demanding yet profoundly impactful profession. Despite the challenges, our job allows us to make a significant difference in others' lives. Let’s not forget to take care of ourselves and each other along the way.